Red Vs Blue: Lelouch of Blood gulch!
by CPU zero heart
Summary: What if Red team got a new member as well as the Blue team when they returned to blood gulch? What if that new member was there new commanding officer under the name of Lelouch Lamprouge? Has an A.I that looks, sounds and acts just like C.C but isn't the real C.C. Story written mostly as the episodes play out.
1. First day on the job

It had been almost an hour since the dumb teenaged girl in yellow armour with the IQ less then a sack of rocks had hijacked and activated the light drive on the ship they were on without proper authorisation by accident and had miraculously landed at there destination a few hounded years later then they were supposed too. Now she had been tapping on the ships hull none stop for the last hour hopeing someone will hear her and save them from her mess.

"would cut that out already!" Growned the only other person with her a slender male solider in black armour with red detailing(halo 3 scout helmet, CQC chest piece and recon shoulder armour).

"Hay some of us are trying to save our sorry asses, that includes yours as well dumb ass!" snapped the teen as she turned to face him.

"Oh really. Then answer me this. If I'm such a dumb ass as you say I am then how come I've spotted the emergency release lever for the cargo bay doors long befor you started banging your fists on said ships hull and screaming for help?" rhetorically asked the man as he walked over to and pulled the emergency release leaver.

"... Oh, I was only testing you! You know that, right?" nervously laughed the girl.

"Think befor you act next time, Dumb ass!" he criticised harshly as the door began to open.

"Smooth moves boy! What's next, being nice to her only to push her off a cliff?" criticised a bright green hologram of a 19-20 year old woman (think C.C from the first few episodes of Code Geass R1) appearing in a sitting position on his left shoulder.

"Shut it Witch!" growled the one the hologram called boy.

"Hay is Boy your name or something?" asked the teenager as the hologram started to giggle.

"No, my name is Lelouch. C.C2 the witch of an A.I. partner of mine calls me that as an insult." Explained the newly dubbed Lelouch.

"Oh, okay. It's just that boy would have been a really awkward name to call someone. Especially if there a girl!" rambled the girl who Lelouch concluded was idiot.

"What ever..." unenthusiasticly replied Lelouch as he stepped out of the now open ship tailed by the girl.

"Sir! The door is open, that mean we won! Another glorious victory for the Rad army." said the voice of a kiss ass from out side the ship.

"it is... I mean of course it is! Looks like my plan worked! Chalk up another one in the column for Sarge! ...Hay who're those guy? Let's shoot them!" asked a senile old man in red standerd issue armour as he tryed to piece back together what's left of his pride befor asking who the new arrivals where befor deciding to and ordering his men (all two of them) to shot them on the spot."

"Try it... (Turns the safety on his SMG off) I dare you, old man!" Calmly threatened Lelouch pointing his SMG at the Red armoured old man.

(a few seconds later)

"Grifs sister!?" yelled the maroon armoured solider in disbelief.

"Yeah, isn't that cool." Excitedly asked this Grifs sister.

"Ya know, I've always known there was a genetic possibility that grif would have blood relatives, but I've always held on to the hope that he was the horrible bi-product of an experimental turd manufacturing plant." admitted the old man in red armour.

"Go home." ordered the one Lelouch assumed was Grif.

"What!" asked his shocked sister

"Go home Right now! Get in your ship, uncrash it and fly home." further ordered her big brother.

"What ever, make me!" she sasses back at him.

"As much as I don't want to spoil my reputation as a do nothing slacker, I will not hesitate to beat your ass senseless and drop you in that ship myself." threatened the slacker of her older brother.

"I'd thought you'd be happy to see me." complained the younger Grif sibling.

"How'd you even get here? We're in the future!" asked the older of the two siblings.

"Hm... I think I know how. Did you use the hyper drive to get here or the light drive?" asked the maroon nerd.

"Which one is the hippy drive? The one with all the knobs or the other one with all the knobs?" asked the teenaged idiot.

"Yeah, she used the light drive, and ias Einistin theorised in his theory of relativity..." herded out the maroon soldier.

"English!" asked grif for all those who aren't huge nerds.

"The theory goes that the closer you travel to the speed of light, the every thing around you slows down. So in essence when your sister dear Grif hijacked the ship she activated the light drive, while we where still docked mind you, she turned the space craft into a makeshift one way time machine this flinging all three of it passengers, her included, into this exact point in time by mere coincidence. Dose that sum it up for you Pvt. Griff?" asked a mysterious new female voice.

"who in tarnation was that? asked a surprised old man with a shotgun looking all around for the source of the voice.

"That would be me gentlemen..." said the A.I. partner of the black and red armoured soldier as it appeared on his left shoulder in a siting position, one leg folded over the other. "Nice to meet you my name is C.C2. The Pleasures all yours." she arrogantly announced herself.

"... Are you a freelancer by any chance?" asked the maroon nerd.

"um... What's a freelancer?" asked a confused Lelouch.

"Wait a god damnded minute..." said the red armoured old man as her readied his shotgun. "If your not a Freelancer then where'd you get that A.I. then son?" he asked seriously pointing the business end of his shotgun in the unknown soldiers face.

"What a woman dose with her partner is none of you're business old man!" crossly stated C.C2 crossing her arms under her chest as she stood up and glared daggers at the old red soldier as if she was accused of being a cheap hooker on a street corner.

"My humblest apologies madam, but I was just makeing sure he wasn't trying to force you do something you weren't comfortable with. I'm sorry if I offended you miss C.C2." apologiesd the shotgun wielding old man in ernest lowering his weapon (I think this suites Sarge's personality and would be something he would say).

C.C2 smiled satisfied with the old mans apology.

"Wait, what? That's it? No interigation, or any thing?" asked a baffled Griff.

"Pvt. Griff, if a woman (the fairer sex) tells you what she's doing is none of your business then by god it's none of your God damnded business! Understood Pvt. Numb-nuts! Do I look like the god damd police to you?" yelled the shotgun holding old coot to his subordinate.

"But Sarge? aren't we going to ask who he is?" asked the maroon nerd.

"Good point Simons, what's your name son?" asked the old man known as Sarge.

"My name is Lelouch, LT. Commander Lelouch Lamprouge. The new C.O. of the red team of blood gulch. I look forward to,working with you all." said Lelouch introduceing himself, his rank and what his role in the box canyon.

"Whaaaaaaaaat!" yelled the soldiers of red team. loud enough for the members of blue team and there oversized leach of a baby alien could hear.

"The fuck was that?" swore a soldier in blue armour holding a sniper rifle.

"Blarge!" barked the alien as if it was agreeing with him.


	2. A misunderstanding and a funeral

Yo!

(Some time after griff's sisters backstory)

"The cool thing is that I was lucky enough to be sent here! They said your commander died and I need to replace the missing troop." explained Griff's little sister.

"But our commanders not dead! I am our commander!" panicked Sarge.

"And an excellent one at that sir!" said the suck up known as Simons.

"Thank you Simons." Sarge thanked the suck up of a soldier.

"Wait. If you're here to replace our dead commander and he's here to assume control of our team, but Sarge is still alive... I don't know about the the rest of you guys but I'm confused as hell right now." said griff who diceded to stop trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together, mostly out of pure laziness and no one ever brought it up again.

"Yeah! Your commander died and one of your troopers is going to be promoted, and I was sent to replace the missing troop!" said Griff's little sister confusing matters further.

"W-What's this about a promotion?" asked Simons who started to act strangely.

'Is this girl colour blind, or is she makeing this up to be with her brother...? Then again, from what I've seen of her so far, she isn't smart enough to come up with something like that... Or is she?' Lelouch stayed quite and listened to the rest of the conversation.

"Sounds like command made a mistake." Sarge was clearly in denial about being thought dead by command and or him being replaced as the Red teams commanding officer.

"I don't know Sarge. Didn't you say command never makes mistakes. That must mean your dead!" said Griff to his former C.O. hopeing that either his sister or this Lelouch guy where right, mainly so he wouldn't have to put up with Sarge's nonsense ever again.

"Seriously what was the promotion thing? I'm sure I head something about someone getting promoted!" frantically asked Simons steering the conversation towards the promotion in hopes it was him getting it.

"They said one of your troops would be promoted to replace your dead C.O." Griff's sibling in yellow armour explained.

"One in particular? One like me? A maroon one?" Simons continued to pester the girl like a vulture circling its next meal in hopes that she responds with a yes.

"Hay, you really scary… That's hot!" said the some how turned on teenaged girl.

"Not tuchen it!" said Lelouch backing away from the girl by good few feet.

"Sarge, l'm really sorry you died!" said Griff in mock apologetically.

"Don't be stupid griff! How can I be dead if I'm standing right here?" rhetorically asked Sarge.

"Well if command is wrong about you dieing Sarge, then couldn't they be wrong about other stuff too, like… Like what is the Blues don't suck? Huuuuh…! What if the Blues are awsome!? This changes everything!" Griff, insulting over exaggerated.

(one shallow grave later)

"Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to pay our respects to sarge." Simons as acting clergyman opened the rememberacne service.

"But I was so young… And violent!" whaled the supposedly dead Sargent.

"And that's what makes this so sad." commented Griff.

"It's official! Command hates me! Why else would they put me in charge of a bunch of idiots." Sighed Lelouch in disappointment. C2 tryed to hold back snicker at how idiotic there teams former C.O is.

"No laughing at a funeral, ma'am! It's considered bad manors." Sarge scolded the A.I. attending his own funeral.

(a few minutes later)

"And now, Griff has asked to say a few things about our beloved Sargent." said Pvt. Dick Simons giving Pvt. Griff the spot light.

"Hay there everybody it's great to be here. Well, what can I say about Sarge? I mean besides good riddance! Hoooooooe! But seriously, Srage lived a grate life and now that he's dead our lives are pretty great too, Zing! Ha ha! You know what I'm taking about!" jeered Grif as if he was at an open mic night in a comedy club.

"Come on! Is this a rememberacne or a roast?" heckled the supposedly dead Sarge off to the far right of the group.

"Boo! Go home!" shouted Lelouch not finding any humour in his comedy routine.

"Go back to your circus' side show attraction of a mother, fatty!" yelled C2 insultingly.

"You tell him!" Simons agreed and joined in the heckling with the A.I.

"Quite in the front row... And leave my mother out of this!" demanded the orange slacker of a soldier.

"Then get a different mother you orange turd!" insulted the A.I only agitating Griff further.

"I will come over there and delete you myself you pixilated bitch!" yelled Griff who's anger was throw the roof with the holographic person.

"Bring it, you orange fuck boy!" challenged the A.I. not backing down.

"Griff vs an A.I? Now this aught to be good. Fight, fight, fight!" chanted Sarge backed by Girffs sister.

"Psssst! Griff, your speech!" Simons remind his fellow red.

"Hu…? Oh yeah, right. Where was I… Oh yeah! I'm not asking and he's not telling, but when Donut first came to the base, Sarge spent a lot of time talking about "glazed donut holes" if you now what I mean. Hay hoooooooooe!" The orange soldier picked up from where he left off. Lelouch turned off his helmets audio respters at glazed.

(one campaign speech from Simons, a speech from Griff's sister and a fart joke later)

"Ugh… I'll just get in my grave…" sighed the Red Sargent disappointedly.

"I think that would be for the best sir." said Simons none sympathetically.

"My God! Who dug this grave? It's exactly to regulation… Better even!" asked/praised Sarge.

"I'm glad you like it sir." answered Lelouch.

"Like it? It's perfect! Son, if you were a lower rank the me I'd put you in for a double rank promotion in a heart beat." praised Sarge

"Thank you Sargent." Said Lelouch thanking him for the compliment.

"If you ever retire from armed services you would make a killing as a one of those guys who dig gave for funerals. Just look at the symmetry! It's a perfect rectangle... And it's just my size too. You son, have a gift." Sarge then added with pride that another red in his box canyon managed to do something so perfectly first time.

"Kiss ass!" complained the resident kiss ass of blood gulch.

"Look who's talking, Simons! It's because of him volenteering to dig that grave that you where able to put so much extra detail into the funeral service." pointed out Griff.

"…Shut up Griff and help me bury Sarge!" growned Simons picking up a shovel in defeat.


	3. Dick Simons the Red army Dicktator! :b

(Meanwhile with the blues)

"So this is it Tucker. This is you're little monstrosity. You're little abomination of nature." the light blue soldier from the end of the first chapter said introduceing the small teal clad alien baby from the end of the same chapter to a soldier named Tucker in teal armour.

"Uh, what do I do?" asked the confused soldier.

"Why are you asking me?" asked the light blue soldier.

"I don't know how to be a dad. This isn't the way I planed it."

"You planed for this!? Tucker, I had no idea." aske light blue in shock.

"No, no! I mean I've always wanted to hav the ideal father, son relationship. You know! Were I see him eight hours every other week and send checks to some woman I hate." said Tucker explaining his "ideal" father, son relationship to his team mates.

"It's emotional conversation like this that make me miss my mom!" blurted out the soldier in cobalt blue armour who stayed quite until now.

"Look, let's leave these two alone, let them do a little bonding." said the light blue one to the Cobolt blue soldier trying to leave Tucker and the alien alone.

"Hay! Don't leave me here with him! What am I supposed to say?" begged Tucker.

"Ask him if he likes base ball!" suggested the cobot blue.

"It's an alien baby, Caboose." explained light blue.

"Ask him if he likes T-ball!" Caboose suggested again.

"Alien, Caboose. Alien was the key word in that sentence." explained light blue yet again.

"Seriously! Don't go! I don't know we're to start." begged Tucker for a second time.

"Tucker, he's part of an alien race who's only purpose is to tell grandiose lies to people so that they can Sadducees them and then impregnat them. So let's start with that, you know some common ground." said the light blue team member as if Tucker would be considered an honorary member of said alien species because they apperently they have the same purpose in life.

"Yeah, I'll just stick to baseball!" said an insulted Tucker.

"Tell him about how his farther got to third base with you." said Caboose as if he just had a brilliant idia.

"CABOOSE!" yelled the light blue soldier at his comrade.

(meanwhile at red base after the funeral)

"Who much oxegyn do you think Sarge has left in his suite?" asked griff couriousily.

"Oxegyn?" asked Simons not expecting that question from Griff of all people.

"Yeah you know, to breath and stuff." clarified the orange soldier.

"If my calculations are correct, then you're Sargent has just under three hours of breathable oxegyn left be for he dies. That is if her Dosent try any strenuous activities down there." answered C.C2 as she appeared in bettewn the two soldiers as her partner approached the two from the direction of Red base still unnoticed by the soldiers under his command to busy to fouces on anyone else.

"He's buried six feet under ground! I don't think he has much chance for activities." said Griff trying to getting his point across.

"Well I don't think you're not an authority!" said Simons acting strangely.

"Authority? We didn't even use a coffin! We just throw dirt on him!" complained Griff as his sister showed up next to him.

"No, I throw dirt on him! You two just pretended to help while makeing a bunch of digging sounds with you're mouths! While that so called "LT. commander" of you're didn't do any thing, he's probably a Blue spy sent to sabotage us! His probably replacing our ammunition with blanks as we speak!" corrected Simons as he then accused his C.O. of being a Blue spy.

"You know that trick?" asked a surprised Grif.

"I learned the best!" said sister praising here brother.

"Well as you're new "actual" C.O. your both gona learn a little disaplin, and your going to start by running laps around the base... Sister you can do girly laps." Simons said in military dictator mode thinking he was going to get the none existent promotion.

"You mean after we dig out Sarge?" asked Griff.

"No! I mean now Griff!" ordered The power mad dictator wannabe swapping his rifle for Sarge's shotgun and priming the first round.

"What are girly laps?" asked a confused teenage soldier.

"Okay, Simons. I don't think sarge is going to like you useing his shotgun..." *click,click* "and I don't think he's gona like you treating me with it... Okay, he might like that though." said Griff truthfully.

"As the new leader what I say goes! So everyone needs to start running, right, now!" Yelled the power mad PVT. Simons.

"What about Sarge?" asked Griff surpriseingly the only one who seems to care about there former C.O.

"You heard what command said, Sarge is dead! He died of a... What he die of? ranted the maroon nerd befor asking Griff's sister the most important detail of all.

"An asperin over douse!" replied Griff's sister.

"See, Sarge died of a... Asperin over douse?" he asked again.

"I know! I didn't think it was possible either, and believe me I tried." admitted the yellow sibling.

"Yeah! Wait, what?" asked Simons yet again.

"Simons don't be stupid! He's not dead! He's just buried under ground covered in dirt!" Griff yelled at the idiot of a comrade of his.

"If I say he's dead, he's dead! I'm the leader now, me! And being leader means you have to make hard decisions... Like just for talking back, you can't do girly laps!" ranted the delouional Pvt. Simons.

"You've gone blind with imaginary power, Simons!" Pvt. Griff accused Pvt. Simons.

"Ho,oh! On the contrary, I think I've gone blind with very real power!" corrected the power mad Simons.

"Seriously! What are girly laps?" aske Griff's sister yet again being ignored by both her brother and Pvt. Simons.

"Both of you shut up! Start running! Im calling Red command for confirmation." ordered Simons.

"Why are you calling red command?" asked the slacker of blood gulch's sister.

"For confirmation! Stop asking questions!" demanded Simons the power mad.

"You keep talking about them. Why don't you call our guys?" asked Griff's sister as if it was the most odvious choice.

"Our guys?" asked a confused Simons.

"Yeah, Blue guys!" answered sister.

"Excuse me? The whazu wha..." said or stuttered Simons at sisiters response.

'I knew it! She is colour blind as well as stupid... Great.' mentally sighed LT. commander Lelouch.

"The Blue guys! The guys who sent me here in the ship." sister said makeing even more scence to Lelouch and even less to Simons.

"Griff?" asked Simons hopeing the slacker would explain.

"Uh,yeah. This might be a bad time to mention the fact that my sister is colour blind." stated Griff regretfully.

"What!" yelled Simons snapping back to reality.

"I don't get it what's the grey guy upset about?" asked the girl in question.

"But girls can't be couloir blind!" stupidly said Simons in his defence.

After a gross and even stupider answer from Griff's sister a split second later, Simons knew he fucked up... Big time!

"But what about that LT. commander Lelouch red lamp guy?" asked Simons again. "If he came here on a blue ship the Dosent that mean he's a Blue too?" he then added.

"The red lamp guy? You mean LT. commander Lamprouge, right?" asked Griff thinking his friend got there new C.O. confused with someone else.

"Lamprouge translated from French it means red lamp, his last name is a french for a red lamp word dumb ass! What kind fo dumb none existent bitch willingly names there son after a coloured lamp. Anyway where is he? We need to find and stop him from crippling our team any further!" ranted Simons paranoid as fuck. (He gona get it for that one)

"Uh... Simons? I think I found him?" said Griff after moving his head a fraction of an inch to his left.

*Chick,Chick* "Evening Gentelmen, and lovely lady. Now then, let's get some misconceptions out of the way, shall we? Red command ordered me to bord that ship, Lamprouge happens to be my mother maiden name, She also died when I was seven during a terrorist attack that also crippled my little sister!, I was the one who cleaned up you're improvised funeral decorations while you buried your Sargent, a senior officer of a higher rank then you! Oh, and befor I forget I am your new commanding officer, not some Blue spy you mutinous maroon moron!" said Lelouch making his presence known to the three while engaging the first round of the sniper rifle he now had in his hands he was pointing at Simons head while his SMG from earlier was on his hip ware his side arm should be.

"Busted~!" said Griff and his sister in a mocking tone.

"Get to work digging out Sarge immediately, Privet Simons or would you prefer to try you're luck at insulting my dead mother again or how about my crippled little sister, who was the reason why I joined the army to provide for her! Your choice Pvt.!" Ordered Lelouch at gun point.

"Yes Sir, right away Sir, I won't do it again Sir!" complied a frightened Pvt. Dick Simons picking up a shovel and getting to work digging up his Sargent as if he should have done that yesterday.

"Hay, sir? Why'd you let us go along with the funeral for Sarge if you knew my sister was on the enimy team?" asked Griff thoughtfully.

"That's easy Pvt. Griff, it's because I already tryed to get your attention while you were setting things up but no one would listen, that's why soldier... And no one asked if she was sent here from red command with me or not." answered the Red teams New C.O. truthfully.

"Oh... Do you really have..."

"Yes,Griff. I actually do have a dead mother and crippled little sister... and be for you ask... yes, I am married!" answered the new C.O. as he showed his subordinate his wedding ring on the chain his dog tags are on.

"Whoa... I was not really expecting that last one though..." said a surprised older Griff sibling.

"Yeah, well people always ask eventually so I like to just get it out of the way." sighed Lelouch.

"Wait... People have ask you so many times before that you have to state it to them when you meet them?" asked Griff curiously.

"It's a long story Pvt. it's a long story..." the LT. commander sighed once again.


	4. Meeting the neighbors and an old friend

"*Sigh* What's taking them so long?" rhetorically asked Lelouch. It had been half an hour since Griff and Simons had jumped down the hole they found at the bottom of Sarge's grave, and he was broad out of his mind waiting for them to return. "Ugghhh... At this point I'll settle for talking with the Blues just to keep from going mad." he growned, the preprogrammed chess games on the base computers were terrible and provided no challenge what so ever, he could no would beat these watered down chess programs in his sleep even if he what'd too.

*ring, ring, ring* "Hay boy, the old man's calling!" C.C2 alerted the Red teams commanding officer.

"Patch ot through to my HUD and keep watch on the parameter and interior of the Base, I don't want any surprises." Lelouch ordered his smart A.I. dropping his false front for his actual persona as the A.I. disappears and the base went into lock down.

"Come in agent Georgia, do you copy? Over!" said a deep authority commanding voice on the other end of the line.

"This agent Georgia reporting in sir!" answered Lelouch Lamprouge A.K.A agent Georgia.

"Where in same he'll have you been son! You were sent there to take over for agent Florida mounts ago and you pick now of all time to show yourself? Explain soldier!" demanded the voice of his superior.

"My apologies director! The Idiot girl we sent as the Blue teams new recruit hijacked the ship in port by activating the light drive when I wasn't looking, sir. But from what I e been able to gather they where helping agent Texas in trying to recapture the omega A.I. but experienced something similar to time travel sending them a few months forward in time sir. The omega A.I. is still on the loose should I recover the asset or destroy it sir?" reported agent Georgia befor asking the director of project freelancer what to do with the rouge A.I.

"Capture it if you can agent but don't blow your cover. As for agent Texas, keep your distance if you can, she'll recognise you instently. ordered the director.

"Copy that command! As for my report on the..."

"Lelouch we have a problem!" eurgently stated C.C2 as she brought up a soldier in purple armour standing out side the locked down base on the monitor.

"Hello? Anyone in there? Hello!" yelled the unarmed soldier.

"What's going on over there agent Georgia?" asked the director.

"Just some soldier in purple armour, no doubt one of the local idiots of the box canyon. He shouldn't be a problem to deal with. I'll call back with a detailed repot once I've driven him off, sir. Georgia out!" said Lelouch hanging up befor putting back on his false front before going to talk to the visitor.

(back on board the mother of invention)

"Councler, contact agent Georgia's spouse and tell her the good news of her husbands well being and that we will continue funding her project." ordered the Director. As the Councler went to inform Lelouch's wife of the good news the Director sat back in his chair on the bridge and continued his own work. 'So Texas is still looking for answers is she? To bad she'll never find them.'

(Blood gulch outpost alpha red base)

"the lockdown will lift in 30 seconds." announced C.C2 popping up back on the Tl. commanders left shoulder.

"Good! It's time we great our guest, face to face." said Lelouch drawing his sniper rifle and aiming it at the exact spot he predicted the unknowns head would be.

Just then the lockdown ended and the under cover agent was sniper rifle to face with his unexpected guest.

"Whoa, easy there! I'm not here to fight you." Yelled the purple soldier with his hands in the air.

"Then why are you here? Start talking Blue or I'll put one between you're eyes!" asked the under cover freelancer.

"Hay, Doc! Why are you over at Red... Well hello miss tall, dark and mysterious. You single? asked a teal armoured soldier only to forget about Doc and started flirting with Lelouch, who he assumed was a girl under all his armour.

"Uh... Tucker nows not the best time for..." said Doc trying to warn the one called Tucker but to no avail.

"Not now Doc! I'm trying to pick up a hot chick here! Now scram, you're cramping my style." said Tucker dosregarding Doc's a temped warning altogether.

"Hay, hot stuff how about you and me go..." *Thwack* asked Tucker before getting a massive blow to the head with the but of the sniper rifle the black and red armoured "hot chick" was holding.

"I'm a guy jack ass! Learn to tell the difference." Yelled an offended Lelouch as his A.I. started laughing until her sides hurt.

"What! Doc, why didn't you tell me before I made an ass of myself?" asked an extremely embarrassed Tucker.

"I tried but you wouldn't listen! Any way, let's just pretend this never happen, okay?" said Doc acting as the middleman in this situation.

"You don't have to tell me twice! I'm out, see ya!" agreed Tucker as he went back over the hill to Blue base to get as far away from here as possible.

"I'll ask again what are you doing here?" asked Lelouch weapon still pointed at Doc's head.

"Take it easy! I'm Doc, the medic here in blood gulch. I just came by to preform a mandatory physical examination befor you start your duties here." explained Doc as calmly as possible dispite having a gun pointed at his head.

"Who the hell told you I was here?" asked Lelouch not lowering his gaurd.

"Hay commander. I mean enimy commander LT. Lelouch Lamprouge sir." greated sister who then corrected herself.

"Oh, that's who... Wait dose that mean the other team knows about me as well?" asked Lelouch hopeing they didn't know yet.

"CHARGE!" yelled a light blue armoured soldier with a sniper rifle and missing every shot by sevral miles as his team mates being Tucker charged forward fireing off rounds from his rifle at the solo red while a soldier in Cobolt blue stood on the hill back faceing his opponent. "God damn it!" he yelled the pre leader frustrated at his poor accuracy.

"God damn it!" swore Lelouch as he swapped around his sniper for his SMG and took sister hostage. "Put down your weapons or the bitch in yellow gets it!" yelled Lelouch as he pointed his gun at sisters head.

"Are you taking me hostage? That's kinda hot! To bad your married though." said Griff's disturbingly turned on sister.

"No, I don't think so. Nice to see you again Lelouch Lamprouge." said Tex who snuck up behind him and was now holding her rifle to his head.

"Talk about karma am I right?" Rhetorically asked Doc.

"Shit... Hello Alison, It's nice to see you too."

"Wait you two know each other?" asked the light blue one shocked at the the coincidence(small wourld).

"Yeah. Church this is Lelouch a sniper I... Meet on a job a few years back." introduced Tex chooses get her words carefully as not to give away his true identity thinking command had sent him hear under cover.

"Huh, well like she said my names Church I'm also known as her X-boyfriend just so you know." said Church feeling kind of threatened for some reason.

'So this is the alpha A.I.? Dosent seem all that impressive. It's probably in a mechanical body.' Thought agent Georgia as he studied the A.I. who thought he was a human.

"So what brings you to blood gulch LT. commander now is it? My how time flies." asked Tex Curiously.

I was give new orders to lead the men of read base here, so I came here. Why is that a problem?" asked back the undercover freelancer.

"No. I just whanted to catch up for old time sake is all." answered Tex befor knocking him out cold.


	5. Saving LT commander Lamprouge part 1

"Ow... My head. It feels like a train hit me at 88 miles an hour!" growned Lelouch as he woke up from his little nap Curtisy of Tex as his vision started return to him.

"Oh, You're awake!" said none other then Doc as he entered the room. "For a moment there I was starting to worry that you weren't." he continued as he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Wha...? Oh, let me guess. It was Tex, wasn't it?" asked a peeved red commanding officer.

"I'm afraid so... Any way now that you're awake we can..."

"I'm not doing the damn fisical, okay!"

"I'm sorry but it's standerd military protacall for all new soldiers to under go a fisical examination before started active dutie. So I'm Afraid you don't have much of a choice, sir." apologiesd Doc in advance.

(one hour later)

"Hay, Doc. Is Lou awake yet?" asked Tex walking over to Doc as he excited Blue base.

"Oh he's awake alright, but he's not exactly in a cooperative mood right now."

"Let me guess, you brought up the whole fisical examination thing didn't you?" asked the freelancer.

"Yeah, it took me a whole 30 minute to get him to hold still. In the end I had to give him a few things to clam him down, but he should be fine right about now." was the medics response.

"... Yeah, any way could you do me a favour and keep these guys out side of the base for a bit? I need to have a word with my old friend we have tied up to a chair in there. You know catch up for old times sakes." asked Tex over explaining her reason.

"Wait... I was supposed to tie him back up?" asked a confused Doc.

"Ugghhh... Please tell me you didn't for get that one important detail?" asked Tex.

"Relax, it was a joke. I tied him back up before I left." said Doc before walking back over to the others.

(back inside the Blue teams base)

"I have never felt so violated in all my life..." stated the under cover agent of project freelancer.

"Hay, look who's finally up. How's the misses doing lately?" asked Tex trying her best to be friendly.

"Alison, good to see you again. doing fine thanks for asking. By the way, thanks for that bash to the back of my head, I've been meaning to get rid of those few hundered brain cells... Why do you want, Tex?" replied an unamused Lelouch.

"What? Not even going to ask how I've been doing? How the hell did you even get a wife with poor manors like that is beyond me."

"Just get to the point, Alison's!" demanded agent Georgia bored with there little back and forth already.

"Straight to the point as always I see... Well, at least that hasn't changed, unlike your armour." stated Tex.

"What can I say? I decided to upgrade a little." said the married man in a mocking tone.

"Well good for you. Now, as for what I want." started Tex before her mood darkened. "I want to know why you ended up here of all places and why your leading the Reds." said Tex taking a page from Lelouch's book so to speak.

"That's classified, Alison. All I can say is that command asked me to come here personally." answered the tight lipped soldier knowing excuses won't work on Tex of all people.

"Seriously, classified? What could there be in this shit hole of a box canyon is there worth keeping under lock and key?" rhetorically asked agent Texas (if only she know).

"Lots of things. For instance Omega, the A.I. and property of project freelancer you let ran wild around here unsupervised for how long exactly ." he sarcastically replied knowing exactly how Tex would react to command knowing about the loss of the Omega A.I.

"What Omega have to do with your assignment here?" asked a curious Tex.

"hehehehehe, that what's classified my dear agent Texas. Now if you could be so kind as to release me so I can be on my way then..."

"No!"

"Wait... What?" asked Lelouch thinking he heard her wrong.

"I said no." repeated Tex.

"And why pray tell is that?" asked an annoyed Lelouch

"Because you haven't told me anything that I can use, that's why!" answered Alison/Tex.

"... Seriously, that's why!? You got to be kidding me..." sighed the defeated freelancer as his A.I. C.C2 appeared in between the the two.

"Agent Teaxs! What a lovely serprise, did you do something with your hair? Or did have you been working on sarcastically greeted the cocky A.I. maliciously apon seeing Tex.

"Fuck off, Charile! Are you seriously still paired up with this holographic bitch?" asked Alison after swearing at the annoying A.I.

"I prefer C.C2, you heartless, unattractive slut!" said Charlie/C.C2 with odvious Venom in her voice. ( A.I. unit Charile the sarcastic part of the Alpha A.I.)

"Yes Tex I'm still partnered with C.C2, And no I'm not changing her for any other A.I. any time soon. Try to be more polite C.C2, people will like you better that way." responded the LT. commander befor scolding his A.I. partner who only huffed and turned up her nose at his scolding.

"Speaking of a sarcastic bitch, why dose she look exactly like you're wife?" asked Tex curiously looking at the A.I. closely.

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that... As for your question, I not sure myself. Though she did work on the Alpha A.I."

"Who knows? It's a mystery, just like the mystery of is Alison's face as ugly as her personality?" joked the artificial intelligence intentionally crossing the line.

"... Okay now I'm definitely going to leave you here!" said Tex as she swiftly left the room.

"And she's gone... Why to go C.C2! You beat you're own personal best." sarcastically growned Lelouch as the A.I. smiled proudly at her acomplishment.

(Mean while down in the underground cave system after Sarge's speech and Simons idea to attack Blue base)

"Hay sarge? How's the guy in black and red armour?" asked soldier in pink(litghish red) armour pointing to the screen he, Sarge, Simons and Griff found eariler.

"What? Let me see." said Sarge as he walk in front of the screen. "Simons, wasn't that new guy on the blue team with Griff's sister?" he then asked the teams nerd.

"No sir. He was actually sent to our base by Red command. Why'd you ask Siri?" inquired Simons as he walked back over to the monitor.

"Why are we talking about sir all of a sudden?" asked Griff.

"Because numb nuts, our new recruit been captured be the enemy! Those dirty Blues, not only did they take our base, but they also hold him prisoner on the same day! There down right diabolical!" said an outraged red Sargent as he reloaded his shotgun.

"We have a new guy on our team? Awesome! So who is he? What rank is he? No wait let me guess in privet 1ft class, right?" asked the pink guy.

"His name's lelouch Lamprouge and no Dount you way off on that guess of ours. He's a LT. commander and our New C.O.!" stated Griff.

"Say what? But I'm our commanding officer." said Sarge confuse about the new turn of events.

"I'm sorry sir but I radioed Red command before we came down here and Vick verified it." said Simons.

"But I'm not dead!" stated Sarge.

"He's not here to replace a dead soldier sir, he's here to take over as our commanding officer." explained Simons mater of factly.

"We'll worry about that later. Right now we have to save one of our own men. Simons, I won't come up with a battle strategy! We're going to war!" the soldier known as Sarge started barking orders mostly to Simons.


	6. Saving LT commander Lamprouge part 2

"Ugh, I'm so board! At this point I'd gladly play that dumbed down chess game just to feel slightly less board." growned the tied up freelancer.

"Well you still have me to keep you company." said C.C2 trying to point out something good about the situation.

'That's even worse!' Lelouch thought dejectedly.

(mean while back in the underground cave system with the rest of the Reds)

"Vic JR. we are going to die if we don't get some help over here!" echoed Sarge's voice through out the caves.

"Okay dude, clam down! Take a chill pill. If you don't have one of those take a chill strip, put it on your tounge and let it dissolve, chill. I'm trying to help you guys but someone's been monkeying around with my equipment. Just give me a second and..."

"Hello, hello? Who's there?" asked Simons approaching the monitor he and the other soldiers of Red team where at a moment ago.

"No! Oh man I got to go bye, try to win!" panicked the unidentified voice befor hanging up just as Simons got with in a few inches of the monitor.

"Who's talking down here? Hello?" Simons asked himself before yelling hello again.

"Hello, I'm still here Vic. We need help!"

"Sarge!?" asked Simons in serprise.

"Simons is that you?" asked Sarge over the radio.

"Yes..." said Simons thinking it should have been odvious that it was him sarge was talking to over the radio.

"What the? You work at command now? When were you promoted?" asked Sarge as confused as ever.

"I don't work at command you called me here. It looks like this monitoring equipment is interfering with or radios, or something?"

"Diabolical! Well get your ceaster back here, red command is useless!" ordered Sarge.

"There's a news flash!" mocked Griff.

"Shut up Griff!" ordered Sarge.

"Did that order come from command too?" sarcastically asked griff.

"In fact it did, and they also ordered my foot up your ass on the double!" rhetorically replied Sarge as he then beat the shit out of Griff.

"*sigh* I can't believe I donated organs for this fucking war!" sighed Simons at his comrades stupidity as the screen turned over to the trio of Church, Tucker and Tex standing on top of the Red base.

"Tex I'm not O'malley!" argued Church calmly at gun point.

"Bull shit! It all makes senses now. You were the one who tolled Gary where we were, you were the one who wanted me to disable shella by moving her to the ship and you wanted the ignition coil once I removed it." said Tex accusing Church of actual being O'malley this entire time.

"That's all coincidence. That Dosent make me evil, it just makes me a bad leader!" said Church honestly.

"Then why would Caboose tell me it's you?" said Tex trying to catch him out.

"You're getting information from Caboose?" asked Church not believing what he was hearing.

"That's right!" said Caboose over the radio.

"Dude, I'll tell you what. If you get me killed again, I gota tell ya this time I'm gona be a little pisst." Church tolled Caboose over the radio.

"Shella tolled me that O'malley might be inside Blue leader." said Caboose repeating what Shella tolled him.

"And that's you!" said tex aiming for his head.

"Shella' crazy remember. Besides I was never officially promoted to Blue leader any way. That's... Oh no!" said Church realising who Shella ment.

[mean while with Doc, Griff's sister and Tuckers alien baby in the cave]

"So that's how you got here Lopez? What a strange yet believable story." said Doc for no apparent reason.

"Quién Es ese chico? [Who's that guy?]" asked the severed robot head known as Lopez as his company turned their attention to there right.

"Hi there, I bond think we've meet. I'm captain Butch flowers and this is my friend." said the presumed dead former C.O. of the blue team introduceing himself as his voice shifted a little.

"Hi nice to meet you... Hay wait wasn't I sent here to replace you?" asked the confused sister of the Red teams Pvt. Griff.

"Honk!?" honked Tuckers kid in confusion.

"Hay there little guy, I've been waiting a very long time to meet you." said captain flowers as his voice started shifting more noticeably then before with he then started laughing like a villain from a bad action movie.


	7. Saving LT commander Lamprouge part 3

Shouldn't we rethink our plan?" asked Griff as he and the other Reds where standing in cave with water up to there ankles.

"Why?" Sarge asked his orange armor clad subordinate.

"Well, now that Simons has cut us off from command, we're attacking the enimy base with no support." explained Griff.

"I didn't cut us off from command!" argued Simons.

"You interupted the radio transmission!" retorted Griff.

"No I didn't! Who ever was talking to Sarge was already down there in that cave, I just walked up and started talking to Sarge in the middle of it!" said Simons recounting the events when he was following the mysterious voice back to its origin.

"What the fuck do you think interrupting means?" sarcastically asked the the box canyons resident number one slacker.

"Can it you two!" ordered an irritated Sarge.

"Yeah, you're giving me a headache!" agreed a irritated voice with a familiar Boston accent.

"Andy!? Is that you?" dumbly asked Simons.

"No, I'm the other talking bomb, Francise! Nice to meet you ya dick head!" said the sarcastic talking bomb.

"I thought you were busy working for the enemy." stated Simons ignored get the bombs sarcasm.

"Meh, they didn't need me anymore. Apparently that revived guy learned enough Alien language to get by, then it was "what have you done for me lately" explained Andy kinda depressed that they didn't need him anymore.

"Hay, what was that deal they were talking about when I was all drugged up?" asked a curious Griff.

"Griff, I'm proud of you! Admitting you have a problem is the first step!" beamed Dount with pride for his friend.

"Fuck off Dount!" swore Griff.

"Baby steps, Griff." said Dount.

"That new alien is here to find the old one and revived the Blue guy to help him, but then something happened to him. I don't know what but he started acting all funky." explained Andy once again.

"The alien revived him?" asked Simons sceptically.

"Yeah, they don't treat life and death the same way we do, in fact that little guy that everyone thinks..."

"We don't have time for this, move out men!" ordered Sarge interrupting Andy's third explaination as Griff, Dount and Simons left the cave.

"Wait! Take me with you!" begged the talking bomb known as Andy.

"Andy, we're going into battle undermanned, low on amo and with no support! What possible use could we have for a bomb?" rhetorically asked Sarge as he then left the cave.

"I could be a lookout or a spy or a chef... or you know, you could use me as a bomb..." Said a sad sentient bomb after lossing his chance to be used for his intended purpose.

"Oh, hay Lopez!" said Andy as the camera panned out to revile the head of Lopez placed on a small ledge to Andy's left or our right.

"Encompass el suyo! [up yours!]" said a peeved Lopez.

[back with the captive Reds LT. commander still tied up at Blue base]

"Sounds like there mobilising there tank, I'm only the Reds C.O. for half a day the and the Blues waste them right after ambushing and capturing me... Sigh!" sighed the Blues prisoner rhetorically.

"It seems the Blues and the old fat ass have got themselves ambushed by Wyoming and his pathological lier of a partner, gamma is Piloting that tank not the preinstalled A.I. they call Shella." reported C.C2 as she appeared I front of the freelancer agent and her partner.

"Shit! Just what I need more people to blow my cover... Can this day get any worse?" asked Lelouch rhetorically.

[back with the as Sarge calls them the Red army]

"There's our base." said Sarge stating the odvious.

"Looks like there in trouble. Is that the bounty hunter guy? He's a dick!" Simons said voiceing his discust for the freelancer he believed was a bounty hunter.

"Ah! The Blues have over extended themselves and spread there fouces to thin, classic blunder. Change of plans men, instead of hitting Blue base and potential save our supposed new C.O., were gona take back our own base!" ordered Sarge.

"Tank!" yelled griff as the Blue teams tank rolled on past them.

"Oh shit!" yelled a panicked Simons.

"Recharge of plans men, Blue base and saving the new guy it is!" ordered Sarge yet again as he and the rest of the Red team ran as fast as they could towards the enamy base and to there captured comrades rescue.

[at Blue base]

"they could have left me something to read before they left... Assholes!" complained the Red C.O. as his A.I. reappeared next to him.

"Hay boy! We've got friendlies incoming! Looks like Griff and Simons made it back alive with Sarge and a new friend of there's too." announced C.C2 getting his attention.

"Finally... Wait! Who's the forth person? Oh that's right there where four red soldiers, the other one must be Pvt. Dount." asked Lelouch before remembering the supposedly dead red soldier in pink armor.

"Give us back the LT. commander you damn... Wait were are the rest of the Blues?" asked Simons after barging into the Blue base prepared for a fight only to be meet with no opponents what so ever.

"Is this the new guy where here to save? He Dosent look as impressive as you made him out to be Simons." asked then said the pink clad soldier.

"Well at least we don't have to waste energy in a needless fight!" stated Griff glad he didn't need to do anything else today.

"The blues don't even gaurd there prisoners? Now that's just sad!" said Sarge disappointed at there enimes lack of common scence.

"About time soldiers! Now hurry up and get me untied this instent, these ropes are starting to chafe." ordered Lelouch stating his amount of discomfort.

"Now hold on a second, how do we know you're not a blue spy like Griff's dimwitted sister... Mister?" asked Sarge as he prevented the rest of his team from helping there new C.O. out of his predicament.

"First off she's as colour blind as she is stupid!" stated Lelouch.

"Hay! She's not that dumb!" Said Griff trying to defend his kid sister.

"... And second, you were the one dumb enough to believe her and go through with his own funeral just because Griff suggested command was wrong for once! Now then, Pvt. Simons untie me this instent!" calmly continued Lelouch while giving off an aura of pure annoyance before ordering Simons to untie him.

"Yes, sir commander, sir!" replied Simons as he got back to work untiring his new commanding officer.

"I never thought I'd see the day that sarge gets tolled off by someone younger then him, and of a higher rank then him as well..." stated Griff impressed yet surprised at the same time.

"Cocky young pup!" grumbled Sarge as he headed to the ramp leading to the roof to avoid any further embarrassment.


	8. End game part one

(some time after LT. commander Lelouch Lamprouge (Agent Georgia) was rescued by the members of red team)

"Whoa! Looks like the blue one just got killed by their own tank!" said sarge after witnessing Caboose being killed by the tank they assumed was still in the blues arsenal while looking down the scope of a sniper rifle.

"A Blue got killed by there own tank? Man, I just had the weirdest secence of Dej Vu." said a confused Simons.

"Hey, speaking on getting tanked we should see if the blues have any beer around here." suggested Griff.

"Hay-ow!" was Sarge's response.

"No drinking while on dutie Pvt. Griff or it's toilet dutie for a month, and you have to clean it with your own toothbrush!" Warned Lelouch as he made his way up the ramp leading to the roof of the base.

Eww! That's just nasty." commented Dount.

"No fair! We take over the enimes base and were not allowed to have a round celebratory drink? You're the worst C.O. ever." complained Griff only for the business end of a sniper rifle to be shoved in his face.

"Oh what's this? Dose our resident slacker have a problem with how his teams new commanding officer runs things now or is it my imagination?" Rhetorically asked Lelouch as he gave off the aura of a king while engaging the first round of his sniper rifle which he had pointed in Griff's face.

"N-No sir, none what so ever. Infact I'll go clean the floors of our newly acquired base right now!" stated a scared Griff as he went in side the base.

"Holy shit! Griff cleaning? Now this I've got to see." said Simons following Griff inside the base.

"Fifty bucks says he only dose a half assed job!" beat Dount following Simons.

"I can hear you ya know!" yelled Griff.

"Ha! I'm starting to like this guy already." stated Sarge amused at the level of ease the young LT. commander manage to get Griff of all the lazy people in the universe to do actual work at his own free will."

"That goes for the rest of the squad Sargent!" clarified the you commanding officer.

"Damn it!" swore Sarge.

[time reverses by a few seconds]

"Yeow za! Looks like the blue one just got sniped." said Sarge stating what he saw through the scope of his sniper rifle.

"Hay speaking of getting sniped we should see if the Blues have any... Beer around here?" said a confused Griff.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" asked Simons.

"I don't know. It sounded a lot cooler in my head." said Griff even more confused then before.

"Man, I just had the weirdest sense of Dej Vu." said Simons.

"What's going on up here you four and what's this about one of you wanting beer?" ordered Lelouch wanting to know what the situation was as he walked up the ramp to the roof.

"One of the Blues was shot by the mercery in White armor that shows up here from time to time, sir!" Reported Simons a little to eagerly.

"Suck up!" name called Griff.

"What? Let me take a look." said Lelouch as he shoved Sarge aside and looked down the scope of his sniper rifle first at Caboose's dead body and then at none other then Agent Wyoming himself.

"Why you miserable young upstart! I'll teach you to disrespect your elders! *Chick,Chick*" grumbled Sarge as he switched to his shotgun and took aim at there new team mates head.

"What the hell! Is that..." was all Lelouch could say before he received a shotgun blast back of his head killing him instently.

"Oh my god! What the hell have you done Sarge!?" practically screamed Simons as he saw his C.O.'s lifeless and headless body hit the floor befor it slides off of the edge of the blue base roof.

"Ru row!" said Sarge doing his best impression of Scooby-Doo.

"I'll tell you what he did! He just killed the commander, that's what! Are you blind or something?" yelled Griff.

"You mean like a bat?" asked Dount.

"Did you say bats!?" panicked Griff.

[time reverses by a few seconds yet again]

"Whoa! Looks like the white one just got stabbed!" said Sarge.

"Hey speaking of getting stabbed... I think I have a headache all of a sudden... and I want a beer?" said a confused griff with a headache.

"Man, I just had the weirdest sence of... What's that thing called when you think you've done something but you don't know if you did or not?" asked a confused Simons.

"How the fuck should I know?" rhetorically asked Griff.

"It's called Dej Vu Pvt. Siomns and no drinking on the job Pvt. Griff or you'll be cleaning the bases toilets with your tooth brush for the next month!" said Lelouch now standing in front of his team of idiots.

""No fair! We take over the enimes base and were not allowed to have a round celebratory drink? You're the worst C.O. ever." complained Griff only for the business end of a sniper rifle to be shoved in his face.

"Oh what's this? Dose our resident slacker have a problem with how his teams new commanding officer runs things now or is it my imagination?" Rhetorically asked Lelouch as he gave off the aura of a king while engaging the first round of his sniper rifle which he had pointed in Griff's face.

"N-No sir, none what so ever. Infact I'll go clean the floors of our newly acquired base right now!" stated a scared Griff as he went in side the base.

"Holy shit! Griff cleaning? Now this I've got to see." said Simons following Griff inside the base.

"Fifty bucks says he only dose a half assed job!" beat Dount following Simons.

"One hundered bucks says he gives up within the first thirty seconds!" said Simons upping the stacks.

"I can hear you ya know!" yelled Griff.

"Ha! Cruel and scaring Griff into volenteering to clean the base by his own free will. Now that's a man after my own heart. I'm starting to like you already son... Have I said that before some where?" said a confused Sargent Sarge wondering if he said those words or a variation of them before to someone else recently.

(sometime after Simons made an easy one hundred dollars and an army of wyoming's showing up out of nowhere and started chasing Tucker and Church all the way from Red base to the middle of the canyon were they meet up with Tex and one disabling of the former Blue team tank later)

"Man that seems like a really big fight." said Simons as he and the rest of red team stood a safe distance away from the action on the captured Blue base roof.

"Yeah, looks like they don't stand a chance. Ha, those Blues are finally getting what they deserve. I always knew this day would come." said Sarge knowingly.

"You mean you knew that the Blues would be killed by an unknown group of clone enimes while in control of our base and while we were in control of there's? Seriously! You knew that was coming?" asked Dount sceptically.

"Absolutely! It was so odvious, durr! Ah, what a glorious day to be Red!" stated the senile old soldier known as Sarge proudly.

'I don't what to know what goes on in that head of his... Ever!' thought Lelouch rolling his eyes behind his helmet at the former leader of the bunch of idiots he was now in charge of.

"And the best part of it all is that the Blues are finally gonna be driven out of the canyon and we sit on the side lines. Man, someone dose all the battling and we just have to kick back and let them take all the glory while we enjoy the benefits. We don't have to do anything!" stated Griff choosing his words poorly.

"Grrrrrrr!" growled Sarge realising the Red teams No.1 slacker was right and that if the just sit on the side lines like he wants then they won't get any of the glory of killing the the Blues themselves and they'd be just bad as said slacker.

"You know, one of these days I don't know when ove really got to learn to shut my big fucking mouth." said Griff realising the error of what he said to late to take it back.

"Yes, yes you should." simply said Lelouch.

(meanwhile with Church, Tucker and Tex hiding behind a rock from the army of Wyoming's)

"Okay! I'll take the ones on the right, you take the ones on the left." said Church as he tolled Tex his game plan.

"There's twice as many on the left." stated Tex pointing out she was given the short end of the stick.

"I know. I can count." was the smart ass reply of her jerk of a boyfriend.

"Just keep backing them up!" yelled Tucker sniping a Wyoming clone.

"What's! What are we waiting for... Wait a second? The hell is that music!" yelled Church as he, Tex and Tucker in that order popped the there heads up from behind the rock they were useing as cover and faced the direction the music was coming from.

Moments later the Red teams jeep with griff driving, Sarge in the passenger seat and Simons on the machine gun flew over the the hill in front of Blue base and rammed into a crowed of Wyoming clones killing most of them as Sarge shot one of the serviveing clones in the face with his shotgun.

"Ye-ha! Now that's what I call "ridding shotgun"! Blamo! Ha ha!" cheered Sarge.

"Excellent shot and follow up one liner, sir." said Simons sucking up to sarge as perusal.

"Thank you Simons, now get blasting!" ordered Sarge as he the shot the Wyoming clone who was trying to hijack the jeep and kill Griff in the process in the face like the last one.

"Yes, sir! Yeah-heh! Suck it Blue and you to white! Suck it crackers!" yelled Simons as he mowed down several Wyoming clones.

"Crackers? I thought you were Dutch-Irish?" asked a confused Griff.

"What's that Bitch? Shut up and drive Bitch!" said Simons rather aggressively as Griff started driving again As Simons continued his killing spree ending it by calling the dead clones "honky mother fuckers" (what ever that means).

"Hay Reds! Why don't you pick on someone your own size!" yelled Caboose who appeared out of nowhere only for the Reds to chase him in there jeep.

"Uh... Is he goning to be alright?" asked Church as he, his girlfriend Tex and Tucker the teams womaniser watched the scene in front of them.

"I am Caboose! The vehicle destroyer!" yelled Blue teams resident idiot as he was being chased by the Reds in there jeep.

"Yeah, probably." said Tucker not interested in whether Caboose lives or not.

"Evening Alison, gentlemen." greeted Lelouch as he walked up to the two blue team members and agent Texas casually.

"Hay Lelouch. I see the morons of red team freed you while we where gone." said Alison acnolageing the under cover Freelancer much to the annoyance of her ex-boyfriend.

"Uh... Hay new Red guy." said Tucker acting like when the first meet didn't count drawing a snicker from Tex.

"Oh, hay who are you doing? Red bastered!" said Church hostly.

"What the hells your problem with him church? He didn't do anything to you." asked Tex.

"I don't know. It's like I've meet him or someone like him who pissed me off some where before and I just can't remember were." said Church trying to remember something important.

"Well good luck with that." said Lelouch sarcastically makeing a mental note to kill him if he remembered him or anyone from project Freelancer.

"Yeah thanks a lot... Duches!" hostly replied the light blue armor clad soldier yet again.

"Any way I just came by to say sorry about what C.C2 said to you earlier." said Lelouch now ignoring Church altogether.

"who's C.C2?" asked Church only to get no answer.

"Why that would be me blue balls." said C.C2 as she appeared on her partners shoulder.

"is he a Freelancer? And why is his A.I. a total bitch?" asked Church deciding he didn't the lime green holographic woman A.I.

"No I'm not! And what the hells a Freelancer?" asked Lelouch sticking to his cover story while trying to come up with a believable excuse. Luckily for him one of the Wyoming clones was still alive and caught the A.I. who thought he was a soldiers attention.

"Hay one of thems still moving." said Church turning everyone's attention to the Wyoming clone who was regaining consciousness.

"What's your plan Wyoming? Why are you here and what do you what with Jr?" Church asked the Freelancer clone. as he walked up to him.

"He already tolled me! My kid's part of that porffeci we thought failed. He's supposed to be some big religious figure for there whole race or some crap!" explained Tucker.

"What!" said both Tex and Lelouch in tandem.

"Yeah, so they can make Jr fulfill the proffeci and have O'malley infect him. Then they can use him to enslave the all the aliens by corrupting there religion from the inside." Tucker further explained.

"Okay, that's discussing!" said Chuch vocalizeing his discust at the Freelancers plan.

'Using a child that's something only a low life pice of scum would come up with.' Thought Lelouch surprisingly agreeing with the light blue armored asshole known as Church.

"No! That's our job ! To win the war at any cost!" said Wyoming still in great pain.

Yeah well good luck with that! Now that we have you all we have to do is stop O'malley and Tex will be more then happy to do that!" Gloated Church thinking that Wyoming has lost.

"Oh on the contrary my friend my friend. Now that she knows our plan, not only will she not stop us, our dear Tex is going to help us!" stated Wyoming triumphantly.

"Oh yeah? I'm sure she'd be happy to help O'malley. Isn't that right Tex... Tex?" said Church who got nervous when she didn't reply to him.

"He's right. This is Freelancer Tex broadcasting on an open chanal."

Tex!? What are you doing?"

"You want me O'malley? Come and get me!" said Tex challengingly.


	9. End game part two

"This is Pvt. Church broadcasting on an open channel!" announced Church as he turned on his radio.

"What are you doing?" Tex asked her asshole of a boyfriend after shooting dead the last Wyoming clone.

"Makeing you harder to find! Tucker, turn on your radio!" Church ordered the dead beat dad of the Blue team who had no doubt had a string of human children somewhere in human controlled space.

"Fuck that! If O'malley gets me he gets the the sword." said Tucker refusing to follow orders from his unofficial team leader.

"Attention all Blues! Turn on your radios and start broadcasting right now!" ordered Church over the radio to the rest of his team.

Okay! I'm on the radio to now! This is fun. What do you want to talk about?" asked Caboose over the Blue teams radio.

"Well he can't find you now Tex." stated Church trying to protect his bitch of a girlfriend.

"Don't get involved Church! Omega wants me he can have me." Warned Alison.

"Why? So you can kidnap Tucker's kid and enslave an entire alien race?" rhetorically asked Church.

"Yeah! What's up with that, bitch!" yelled Tucker.

"We have to win the war, Church." answered Tex.

"Well what about after! You think he's just going to stop after he gets an entire spices for an army? He's gonna take over everything, Tex and your not going to be able to stop him!" ranted Church long windily.

"I guess we'll find out." said Tex choosing to deal with what Church said might happen when it happens.

"Hay Tucker, who's O'malley and why'd you bring a kid here of all places?" asked Leouch couriousily.

"Wait? The Reds didn't tell you? *sigh* where to begin...(one summarised explanation from Tucker later) so that's everything that's happened up until you and sister arived in the canyon and what Romeo and Juliet over there are arguing about." said Tucker finishing his story.

"... You gave birth... To an alien infant?" asked Lelouch feeling a combination shock, horror, discust and curiosity.

(one call over the radio from Doc to Church later)

Everyone raised their weapons mostly three sniper rifles at Tex as she raised he battle rifle at Church.

"Tex, is he in there?" asked Church wearily.

"No. Is he in you?" Tex asked back.

"Bull shit! I think you're lying. I think that..." said Church beginning his rant before the unexpected voice an O'malley possessed Simons boomed over the radio distracting the two Blues and lone Red soldiers long enough for Tex to blind side Church and fun off in the Red teams general location.

"Fuck! Tucker, Red guy stop her!" yelled Church as he fell over in pain as Tucker started to shoot at and throw a few grenades at her each one missing there mark.

*Bang!* "Son of a bitch!" yelled Tex as she barely dodged an entire magazine of sniper rounds curtesy of Lelouch. 'Well he's not ranked number five on the score board for no reason.' thought Tex as she continued to dodge a barge of sniper rounds from Lelouch and several grenades thrown by Tucker.

(mean while in our univers... I mean with the rest of Red team)

"Hay who the hell are you calling a bafoon? I am not a bafoon, I don't even know what bafoon is." said a confused Griff to the evil A.I. possessed Simons.

"Both of you shut up!" ordered an annoyed Sarge (it wasn't very effective).

"Seriously what is that? Some kind of monkey? It's a monkey isn't it?" asked Griff convinced Simons was calling him a kind of monkey that rhymes with baboon.

"Hay Reds!" yelled Church as he and Lelouch ran over the hill in there direction getting there attention."

"Freeze ya dirty Blue! Wait what's are new guy doing with you?" yelled Sarge as readied his shotgun only to ask why Lelouch was with Church.

"Stand down Sargent, we have a temporary truce with the Blues for the time being." ordered Lelouch as he and Church came to a stop in front of his team.

"But he's a Blue! One of our sworn enimes! I don't like it!" said Sarge yelling his disapproval at the end.

"I don't care if you like it or not Red, I'm here to help. Omegas on the loose and I think he's infected one of your guys." explained Church.

"Infected! Inisheate contingency plan Delta men!" ordered Sarge then shooting Griff as Simons snuck behind the warthog.

"Oww! What the fuck!" yelled Griff in pain as he feel to the ground.

"I didn't say who. I think it might be Simons." said Church whispering the last part while Lelouch and the A.I known as C.C2/Charile stood there in shock at what just happened befor she broke out in a laughing fit at Griff's expense which the wounded solider yelled "Screw you, ya holographic bitch!"

"That's okay. That's how all our emergency plans begin!" said Donut like nothing unusual happened as Griff tryed to get up.

"Okay, when this is all over we really need to have a meeting and discuss each of our plans be me for approval, but first thing on that list is to take our the parts where we shoot our own soldiers at the beginning of each plan!" said Lelouch snapping out of his shock.

"Thank you sir." growned a thankful griff as he tryed to steady himself.

"Simons, get of that gun right now!" ordered Sarge to his uncharacteristically disobedient soldier.

"No!" yelled the possessed Simons.

"What did you say?" asked Sarge in disbelief.

"I said No! Hahaha! How do you like that? No!" rhetorically asked the evil A.I infected Simons.

"Well since you asked, I don't like it at all!" yell Sarge answering his subordinates rhetorical question.

"I think he was being sarcastic when he asked that Sargent." said the old sargent's C.O.

"First I'm gonna kill you, then the commander and then my plan to be leader of the Reds will be complete!" Said Simons befor continuing his crazy long winded rant.

"Uh... Yeah it's definitely Simons who got infected." said Church stating the odvious.

"No shit Sherlock!" sarcastically replayed Sarge.

"I should have killed him for insubordination earlier today when I had the chance." said Lelouch regretting not doing what he just said earlier.

"Dount! Enisheat emergency plan traitor Simons number elven!" ordered sarge.

"On it sir!" replied Dount as he then shot Griff who fell to the ground for the second time that day.

"Dount! I said plan eleven!" yelled Srage at the pink armored soldier.

"Where am I going to find a steamroller?" asked Dount.

"A steamroller!? Are you kidding me! At least come up with something feasible!" yelled Lelouch out raged at his teams stupidity.

"Simons , don't fire that an order!" ordered Sarge but to no avail.

"To late Sarge! Simons is getting a nice cushy promotion." said Simons about to fire the machine gun when Tex pulls him off of it and literaly tries to beat O'malley out of the poor mutinous fool.

"Hay Church, I think Tex is over here!" yelled Tucker a few minutes to late with his warning.

"Thanks for the update!" sarcastically yelled back Church.

"Tex I know now might not be the best time, but I'd really like you to consider coming over to the Red team. Technically black is just a really dark shade of red." said Sarge trying to convince Tex to join the Red team only for Church to glare at him from under his helmet. "We'll talk later!"

"Church are we still talking on the radio?" asked the dimwitted Caboose only for him to be O'malley's next host. "Mwhahahahahaha! Becaus I love talking on the radio! What? What am I doing in this idiot?" asked the possessed Caboose befor Tex left her body followed O'malley into Caboose's head.

"Ugh... Hay new guy, I need you to do me a favour. If I'm not out of there in ten minutes I'm gonna need you to disable that ship. If Tex gets out of here with O'malley and that kid, there's no one who can stop her. Oh be the way she has the ignition coil on her." said Church be for leaveing his body at following agent Texas/Alison into Caboose's empty head.

"What the hell is he talking about?" asked a confused old man named Sarge.

"Oh, Tex and Omega have some stupid plan to enslave the whole alien race, but Church think if she dose she'll become queen of the universe or some shit." Tucker explained to the Reds.

*Gasp* "Queen of the universe! No one even tolled me we where having a compation!" gasped Dount in surprise.

"That's because we're not Pvt. Dount." said Lelouch shooting down Dount's hopes.

"Awwww, no fair." Whined a disappointed Dount.

"What in Sam hell just happened here?" asked Sarge.

"I'll tell you what happened! My own fucking teammates... *Bang* Oww!" yelled Griff as he was shot for the third time that day this time by Simons as he was now back to his senses.

"Nice to have you back, Simons." said Sarge ignoring what happened to Griff all together.

"Thank you sir, it's good to be back! Cocksucker!" said Simons sucking up to Sarge as usual before insulting him under his breath.

"Sarge can I talk to you for a second?" asked Lelouch.

"You aren't going to start barking orders at me are you?" asked Sarge still not fond of his replacement.

"I was just thinking, since I'm going to take command from you why don't I let you take charge of this last mission befor that happens." said Lelouch.

"Say what now?" asked Sarge in surprise.

"You heard me Sargent, I here by give you command of this mission until the situation with Tex and O'malley is resolved. Think of it as one last battle before handing over the rains." said Lelouch clarifying his orders as he walked over to the lifeless robot body of Tex and rooted around her personal belongings for the ignition coil.

"Son, I'm so touched *snif* I don't know what to say." said a grateful Sarge.

"Why are you crying? Just ten minutes ago you hated him for being your replacement." pointed out Griff.

"Shut up Griff!" shouted sarge. "Alright then, let's go blow up that ship!" said sarge as he got in the drivers seat of the warthog.

"Hay! Church said to wait till he got out!" said Tucker.

"Well that's a nice plan son, but blowing stuff up ain't a democracy. Simons were can we get some explosives?" Sarge asked his suck up of a subordinate.

"Well if you recall sir, we recently saw Andy the bomb and Lopez in one of the caves so..." started Simons.

"Of course! Come on men let's go ask Lopez if he knows where we can find some explosives we can use." ordered Sarge.

"*sigh* excellent plan sir." sighed Simons dejectedly as he and griff got in the jeep and drove off in the direction of the caves.

"Hey new guy why didn't you stop them?" Tucker asked the Reds new commanding officer.

"Not at all my teal armored friend. Now that they're dealing with the ship I can halt Alison's plans even further by taking this off her hands." said Lelouch walking over and taking the ignition coil from agent Texas' lifeless body before heading to Red base with dead Wyoming clone in tow.

"What is it with the Reds in this canyon and there bat shit crazy plans?" rhetorically asked Tucker in confusion.


	10. End game part three

"Okay Andy, we're gonna need you to get on that ship and explode. Think you can take out the whole thing?" asked Sarge to the bomb he dropped next to the head of Lopez the Red teams resident spanish speaking robot in front of the ship in the middle of the canyon.

"You bet! Just say the word and I'll detonate. Man, this is gonna be great!" said an excited talking bomb finally getting to do what he was made to do explode.

"Hello Lopez~!" said female computer voice out of nowhere.

"Sheila? ¿Rees tú? [Sheila? Is it you?]" asked the spanish robot to the spaceship he was placed in front of.

"Yes. It is good to see you again." said Sheila.

"Whoa-Ho! Lopez, looks like your girlfriends put on a little wight!" mocked Andy.

"Andy that's rude!" scolded Dount.

"What! You were all thinking it. I mean I'm just saying someone should consider switching to unleaded."

(meanwhile with Lelouch)

Half a minute after leaveing a confused Tucker alone in the middle of the canyon the first ting the undercover freelancer did was eject memory card like divice containing C.C2 from his helmet and plunged it into the main console of the Red teams base before running off down the hall and returning seconds later with toolbox in hand.

"So tell me why you need the dead body of one of you're former Co workers again?" sceptically asked C.C2 seconds after Lelouch plugged her into the Red base's main console.

"What dose it look like I'm doing? I'm turning Wyomings armor into a makeshift storage unit." said Lelouch kneeling brown beside the Wyoming clones body and setting the toolbox down beside him as he set to work on his task.

"You do realise that Wyoming's body is still in there right?" rhetorically asked the sarcastic A.I.

Of course I know that! That's why I'm going to remove it befor turning it into a capture unit." said Lelouch trying to concentrate on his work.

Well I'd recommend turning off your helmets radio before Omega gets to you now that I'm not there we wouldn't want that now would we, boy?" recommended his A.I partner Charile/C.C2 from the base's computer.

"On the contrary my dear artificial intelligence friend, that is exactly what I want him to do!" surpriseingly anward the freelancer know as agent Georgia as he finished removing Wyomings corpse from what was once his armor and dragging it out behind the base with great difficulty (and only managing to do so because of his armor giving him the strength to do so) and returning to the empty armor moments later. "My plan is to have him infect me while I have my armor's radio connected to the device and trap him inside useing a one way connection it should work in theory but I have yet to test it. said Lelouch removing parts from the inner workings of Wyoming's armor and fashioning them together into a make shift capture divice.

"And I'm in here why exactly?" asked the A.I annoyed at being stuffed into a cramped computer filled with all the girly stuff Dount has downloaded over the years.

"Because, having two A.I's in the one persons head is borderline suicide. Have you even seen the reports of what happened to agent Carolina when they tryed that with her? That and I need you to keep an eye on the idiots native to this box canyon while I make the divice." explained Lelouch putting the last two pieces of the hand made capture unit together.

"point taken... Well you better finish that thing fast, because Omega and black armored bitch just left that blue idiots head and is now in the head of the pink one. Oh and someones outside the base. I'm not sure who though."

"Shit!" swore Lelouch as he got up off the ground unplugged his A.I from the console and back into his helmet before readying his SMG and gabbing the Half finished divice and ran towards the enterace.

(a few moments earlier with the simulation troopers)

*pop* "Caboose! What happened?" asked a frantic Church after reappearing a few feet away.

"Tex appeared out of nowhere and beat up Tucker, which was awsome and took his sword. Also someone many have been surprised by that and may have peed his pants a little bit... Or a lot." answered Caboose.

"I was only behind them by thirty seconds, what the fuck! Where is she!?" asked Church.

"She took the sword and a Wyoming helmet to the ship. I think she went to the ship to save Tuckers kid! He's on the ship to now." answered Caboose even more stupider then last time.

"FUCK! What about O'malley, where is he?" asked Church again this time about O'malley this time.

"Hahahahaha! That's the problem with liveing in a patriotic society, me just automatically assume they know everything! Hahaha!" yelled an O'malley possessed pink soldier.

"Never mind!" yelled Church after getting his answer.

(present time in front of Red base!)

*pop* "Huh? What is this place?" asked man in yellow armor who appeared exactly like Church did a few seconds ago.

"Hay you! Who are you and what are you doing here?" yelled a soldier in black and red striped armor who the soldier recognised instantly from the one he knew in Caboose's head.

"LT. Commander Lelouch? Is that you? Oh my god! what are you doing here?" asked the bewildered yellow clad soldier as he went to greet him failing to notice the corpse of Wyoming he was standing by a few seconds ago disappearing.

"Who are you, why do you sound like Pvt. Church and why do you know my name?" asked Lelouch surprised the unknown person knew who he was while he knew nothing about him.

"What are you talking about? It's... sigh... It's me sister, Church's twin brother who came here in the space ship that crashed close to with you. You have amnesia or something?" asked the clearly confused soldier.

"Nice try. Like I'd mistake a girl dumber then a sack of rocks for a guy with an actual brain between his ears. You know what never mind! I've got bigger problems to deal with right now like an evil A.I so I'll be on my way." said Lelouch as he ran past the delouional soldier.

"Hay! What's going on here, why don't you remember me, where's everyone else?" yelled the soldier calming to be Church's twin brother as he chased after Lelouch.

(meanwhile with Tucker)

"Well hello fellas. How's every thing out here?" asked captain Butch Flowers makeing actual conversation with one of his teammates since he was killed off seasons ago.

"Not good! Hay you don't sound evil anymore." said Tucker pointing out the odvious.

"Thanks for noticing Pvt. Yeah, being possessed by an evil force can be difficult at times, but with a little hard work and some positive thinking you can over come anything." said Butch like he was a character from a G.I. Joe the more you know short.

"I think you mean hard work, positive thinking and no longer being useful as a pawn in there evil plan." corrected Tucker.

"Yeah... That too. So who are we fighting today?" asked the former blue team leader.

"Ah you know the usual Tex, Red team..."

"Red team, Those rascals. Somethings never change. They still wearing Red armor theses days?" asked Flowers cutting Tucker off.

"Um... Yeah." replied the teal armored soldier.

"Oh Red team."

"Speaking of change the Reds have a new commanding officer while we just got a new recruit." said Tucker informing his legally dead commander of the resent events.

"A new recruit? Wonderful! I can't wait to... Wait, did you say the Red's have a new C.O.?" asked captain Flowers genuinely surprised by this piece of news.

"Yeah. Some LT. Commander named Red lamp or some shit. Tex seems to know him." said Tucker who didn't bother to remember the name of the person he was talking about.

"Who? You mean Lamprouge right?" asked a confused Blue team leader.

"Yeah that guy. Wait, you know him?" asked Tucker.

"Why yes I do Pvt. So where is he any way?" answered Butch who then asked where the Red's new commander is.

"He ran back over to red base awhile ago. Oh! Hey he is now. Wait, who's that following him?" said Tucker noticing the Red C.O running past them while being followed by someone he Dosent know.

"Oh hay Lelouch. Long time no... Rrrgh bleggh!" called captain Flowers only to be shoot in the head midd sentence.

"Good riddance. I wasn't giveing this armor back any way." said Tucker as he went to go find the rest of his team.

(meanwhile with the Reds)

"Easy Donut. You've been infected by a computer virus and we just have to figure out what to do about it." said Simons trying to calm down the possessed lightish-red soldier as Tex snuck around them in the distance.

"No! It's my body, my choice and another thing, why do I do as much work as you guys but only make ninety two percent..." ranted Donut only to be bashed across the back pf his head by Tex half way through his rant.

"Hay! Don't hit my soldiers without my permission!" yelled Sarge only to be the next Red team member to be infected by O'malley.

"I'm the only one who gets to hit my soldiers. Mwhahahahaha! Eat lead world! Drop and give me infinite!" ranted the possessed Red Sargent.

"Sarge I think you've finally gone crazy." stated Griff as Tex hit Sarge hard enough to knock O'malley out of his head and into Griff.

"Whoa. That's weird, I have a sudden eurge to concur the univers which is odd cause that would take actual work. I'm gonna go to sleep instead." said possessed Griff as he feel asleep as O'malley left his head.

"We're here! Dose anyone need healing?" asked Doc only to get possessed by O'malley yet again.

"Does anyone need killing? Hahahahaha!" menially laughed the possessed feeler medic.

"I know that laugh! No one..." said Church befor being interupted by the black armored soldier of the Red team.

"Don't worry men I've got everything under control..." said Lelouch as he stopped just short of the simulation troopers and freelancer known as Tex just be for being possessed by O'malley like the others.

"And by under control I'm mean I have you simpletons graves already dugout and waiting for you're freely slathered corpses. Mwhahahahahahahaha! Wait? Am I inside of Lelouch's head? What's he doing here? Oh, good evening C.C2. Forgive me, I didn't see you there till just now." said a O'malley possessed Lelouch with a distorted voice (think his Zero voice from the anime).

"Apology accepted. It's good to see you to Omega or should I say O'malley? After all it is what you call yourself now a days is it not?" said O'malley's theoretical sister returning his greeting.

"Seriously! Even O'malley knows this guy!? What the hell? How many people has he meet that we already know? Wait a minute, who's that guy? Wait a minute you're Sister from when I went into Caboose's head! How did you get out?" ranted church be for noticing the extra soldier in yellow armor behind Lelouch.

"Uh.. You killed us both jack ass that's how." said Caboose's interpretation of Griff's sister who the dumb Blue soldier thought was Church's twin brother by the name of Sister with the exact same voice as Church.

"Wait that idiot thinks my sister is a guy!?" asked a confused Griff.

"apparently so and he thinks that Sister is my twin brother of all things, I mean how messed up is that?" asked Church rhetorically.

"I know that morons brain was as empty as a cave absent of bats!" stated the O'malley possessed Lelouch agreeing with Church one hundered percent.

"What about me?" asked the real Sister as she appeared beside Tucker a split second later.

"Wait, you mean I'm the product of some idiots imagination?" asked male Sister about to have an existential crisis.

"Yep!" bluntly replayed Church and Tucker.

"Welcome to the real world! My names Dount. Nice to meet you Caboose's interpretation of Griff's sister." said Donut intoduceing himself to the new soldier in the box canyon.

"Um... Hi, I guess?" responded the new guy.

"That's ridicules! Church Dosent have any siblings!" said Tex/Alison.

"Not according to that Blue armored bafoon he dosent." said the possessed Red C.O.

(meanwhile inside Lelouch's mind)

"God damn it! Why didn't I turn off my radio be for coming here?" swore Lelouch in side his own mind (which looked like a massive rich persons private library) beating himself up for his simple oversight.

"Quite your whining you fool! It hard to think with you constantly berating yourself." complained O'malley sitting in a Victorian style arm chair reading a book labelled childhood memories 7-18 which he already made a huge dent in reading wise since he was already halfway finish said book.

"Hay! Give that back!" yelled Lelouch trying to gab it from the insane A.I program but failed.

"No way! I just got to the best part were you swear bloody vengeance against your biological father for throwing you and your blind and crippled sister out into the harsh, cruel world because your mother was killed due to a terrorist attack which was the same incident that crippled your sister Nannaly." argued back O'malley jumping out of the raven haired Freelancers way.

"Get back here!" yelled Lelouch chasing the A.I through his own mind.

(back to everyone else in blood gulch)

"Alright no one move!" ordered Church as he activated his radio Causeing O'malley to jump from Lelouch to him though not effecting him at all which confused long enough for Tex to beat O'malley out of him and Causeing him to infect her instead.

"Where'd he go? Is he gone? ...Tex?" frantically asked Church befor noticing the loud beeping coming from Tex's armor.

"Church, run!" Alison warned her boyfriend.

"Tex, don't!" yelled Church but I was to late.

"You have no idea what kind of trouble you are in for. Hahaha!" Laughed the now possessed agent Texas as she sucker punched Lelouch in the gut who feel to his knees and dropped the ignition coil as she then picked it up and ran for the ship.

"Son of a bitch!" swore Lelouch from the blow to his abdomen.

"Tex, don't do this!" begged Church as the ship know also known as Sheila prepared to take off.

"What's goning on here asked the yellow armored guy who keeper quite until now.

"You have to stop her fight now!" Church yelled at Sarge.

"No prob-lamo Blue. Andy you there?" said sarge who then called Andy over the radio.

"I'm here coach!" replied an excited talking bomb.

"What's going on?" Church asked the talking bomb who doubled as a translator.

"Tex is hooking up Wyoming's helmet to the computer." said Andy reporting what he saw.

"Ready for your job soldier?" asked sarge.

"You bet!" replied Andy.

"Alright then son. Do what you were born to do, detonate!" ordered Sarge.

"Hay, you want me to start from three or ten? Come on the suspense will kill them!" asked Andy as he then started counting down from ten.

"I tolled you to disable the ship not destroy it!" Church yelled in Lelouch's ear as he leaned on his sniper rifle which he was useing as a crutch.

"Don't yell at me duche bag yell at Sarge, he's the one who planted the bomb on your girlfriends ship." retorted Lelouch.

"What?" asked Church now looking at Sarge.

"Oh we'll score one for the Red team I guess." said Sarge noneshalntly.

"What about my kid?" asked the resident worried single parent of blood gulch.

"Alright, score two." Sarge correcting himself.

"Andy, do not detonate! Can you see there heading, do you know where there going?" asked a frantic Church as Andy finished his count down as the ship went into slip space.

"Tex..." quitely asked a devastated Church.

"Booo! No explosion! That sucks." said Griff looking away in disappointment.

*Ka-Booooom!*

"Ha ha! Ka-blamo!" cheered Sarge proud of Andy's last act which he believed brought the Red team glorious victory over the accursed Blues.

"Wow! That explosion was awsome!" said the lighting red solider who saw the explosion unlike Griff.

"What explosion? I didn't see it. Do it again." asked Griff who missed out on the once off sight.

"What just happened?" asked the confused male Sister from Caboose's head.

"I'll fill you in later solider." said Lelouch who gave the belived to be dead Tex a moment of silence.

"Uh Church? What should we do?" asked Tucker stopping Church in his tracks.

"Do what ever you want! I'm going home." said a mourning Pvt. Church.

"Yeah fuck this!" said Tucker said in agreement.

"Sarge? Are we fighting?" asked Simons confusedly.

"No Simons, I think they've had there butts kicked enough for one day. Let's leave some for tomorrow." said sarge satisfied with blowing up Tex's ship.

"I couldn't agree more Sargent. Now about our deal." said Lelouch reminding Sarge of there eariler agreement.

"Oh okay! I sarge, current leader of the red army outpost here I blood gulch here be officially hand command of the red forces stationed in thi here box canyon over to... To...?" said sarge forgetting his successors name.

"LT. Commander Leouch Lamprouge!"

"Lamp what know?" asked a confused Sarge.

"Lamprouge, sir it means red lamp in French." Clarified Pvt. Simons.

"Wait you have red in your name? Well why didn't you say so son? This changes everything!" stated sarge doing a one eighty with his mood.

"I'm pretty sure I said that when we first meet." said Lelouch confused by the old Sargent's random mood swing.

"Oh! We'll never mind, you get the job son!" said Sarge handing over control of the team to Lelouch.

"Thank you Sargent, and for my first act as I here by assign the position of my second in command to..." said Lelouch only for a promotion hungry vulture known as Simons intrupt him.

"Is it me?, please say it's me, I'm right aren't I?" frantically asked the maroon suck up.

"No! Now back up, you're to close for comfort." ordered Lelouch.

"Oh... Okay." replied a disappointed Simons backing up from the commander. "What!"

"Okay, like I was saying befor I was rudely interrupted. I here by name Sarge as my second in command until a soldier of a higher rank then him joins are team." announced Lelouch.

"What!" yelled Griff.

"Congratulations on the promotion Sarge!" said Donut congratulating Sarge.

"Congratulations Sir!" said Simons in suck up mode.

"Thank you Donut, thank you Simons, shut up griff!" thanked Sarge before telling griff to shut up.

"Now on to the matter of what to do with this guy." said Lelouch turning everyone's attention to the yellow armored soldier standing a few feet away from them.

"Finally some answers! First off what's going on... Blarge." said the soldier from Caboose's imagination be for he died from a shot to the head (most likely Church gave his sniper rifle to Caboose and tolled him to "help" the poor soul).

"God damn it!" swore the Reds commander.

END! (For now!)


End file.
